A Few Important Religious Ideas
Daryl Scroggins

I've got it set up to where I can be exactly the way I want to be, and I'll feel bad about it for a moment, then -- relief.
I'm going to keep myself hammered down hard and impervious to the temptations of a big set of wrongs, until the chance comes to really cut loose in some area not covered.
It's all part of a plan I can't know anything about, except for a few things that suit my needs and don't really have a big impact on the overall plan.
So much good to do, no time to think about it.
There's something wrong with you if you don't see things exactly the way I do, because I rely on simple personal revelation to understand everything as it is.
If something bad happens to those people it's because they deserved it, whereas bad things that happen to me are caused by those people.
Everlasting life will be great! But it's wrong to think too much about the particulars of it, such as -- if it's going to be me living there, and I get bored here, won't I be bored as shit after a few billion years? Also, will I be in with a bunch of people from way back who didn't have TV and are scared of it every time I turn it on? I'm sure all of that sort of thing will be ironed out, since it's just common sense that it would be.
If I wasn't a Christian I'm sure I would be out there raping animals and throwing children off of cliffs and shooting my friends through their eyes and robbing charity collection boxes, because what would there be to keep me from enjoying myself?
Use logic until you get cornered -- then jump over to faith for a while until you can slip back in with logic again.
God should help those poor screwed up fuckers.
There is evil in the world because God wants to make sure we will do that kind of stuff for him if the plan calls for it.
Some people say it's like free choice with a gun to your head, but when you really think about it you can't have anybody opting out of the whole thing because then, in the afterlife, there might be big gaps: Where's Uncle Frank? etc. and that would cause strife, and if God was to just "invent" another Uncle Frank on the spot to fill in, well, somebody close to Uncle Frank would surely suspect something -- and that would tend to undermine the general sense that rules are in place and being followed, and that we, the everlasting, aren't being jerked around in some way in spite of all the loyal service we have provided.
If I did know the mind of God I wouldn't tell anybody -- since He wouldn't say you can't know that unless He had a reason for wanting it to be that way and to stay that way -- unless I was a Preacher, in which case I would be knowing God's mind because He wanted me to, and therefore I could say it and we could all know it and he still gets His way (except that we know something we really aren't supposed to) and He can back off anytime and make us take the rap for it if something doesn't work out, and it's all just part of God's working for us for a better America.